It has been less than twelve hours since JW left for Korea, but it is feeling like a life time. The thing is, this is normal, he has traveled the entire time I have known of him. In fact when our friend was trying to hook us up the messages didn’t go through, because he was in Germany at the time. But, this time it feels as if someone was ripping my little pink heart out my chest, as I sat watching him rush to pack toiletries and thermals. “How am I supposed to react?” has my stomach in knots. Do I try to hold it together so that he knows I will survive here by myself, or do I let the waterworks go because I am just a girly girl. After a long debate, I decided to be strong. . . and it worked for me. Until it was time to say Good-bye, then he hugged me and every moment we have shared rushed into me and the beauty of us poured down my face. “Why is it so different now?”I asked myself. It became apparent how much we have evolved as a couple, and how much of our time is spent doing things to together. It breaks my heart even in writing this to know he will be 16 hours away separated by land and sea. I can’t pick up the phone and dial knowing he will pick up, he will not be here to rub my head as I sleep. Sigh! Yet, I am comforted in knowing that our love for each other can go the distance and stand tall waving its flag, no matter the language or country.
After rushing to bed last night hoping this morning would ease my heart a bit, I am disappointed that it is not any better! I am missing this man like no other! The first thing to do is to check my Email, FB, Twitter, every modern day form of communication to ensure he is safe. And there they are on FB, and Yahoo, messages saying I have made it safely and words of love and encouragement. “Thank God!” Now I can make it through this day! I decided to hangout with myself catching up on work and running errands. After a great afternoon, I returned home and. . . here comes the sad face. I am missing him more, but then I hear an odd ringing sound. I can feel my heart pounding and the butterflies stirring, I’m having flashbacks of being in High School and your crush calls you! So, I check the computer and there it is a little blue cloud doing the Happy dance and singing “JW calling, JW calling!” Skype actually works! I answered quickly, “Hello!” And there it was clear as day the voice of the man who holds my heart. I began to weep, who would think in an age of visual effects, the sound of one’s voice would be one of the most beautiful things I have experienced!